Crazy Love Week 3

"The irony is that while God does not need us but still wants us, we desperately need God but don’t really want Him most of the time."

That's a pretty powerful statement and one I fully practice not very long ago. However about a year ago and every day sense I really try to live my life showing others how much I desperately WANT God. The topic of this weeks discussion was focused on one part of chapter 3 and honestly it almost felt like the message was straight affirmation for me. The focus was on Loving God because you have a crazy love for him, and not because the rules, or church, or your parents or friends tell you too. This is the life I lead and I constantly find myself having to explain this to others.

This is a VERY common conversation for me.

Friend: Want to go out of town/to Disney/to dinner on Sunday/Tuesday/Wednesday?
Me: Sorry I can't I have church, I don't miss church.
Friend: But its ....DISNEY (or anything else they deem worthy)
Me: No I really don't miss church.
(attempt #2) Friend: But its only Fuse, or Bible Study, or Life group its not like Church church.
Me: No I really don;t miss church.
(attempt #3)Friend: But you just went yesterday.
Me:No I really don;t miss church...

This can go on for a very long time. To me anyplace where I can go, learn about the Word, and gather with people to worship God, even if its not "Church, Church" (Which by the way is the most absurd thing I ever hear) take a priority in my life. There are VERY few things that will make me miss church or Fuse or Life group or Awana.

All this is not to say I am somehow more spiritual than others because I am always at church, quite the opposite. I LOVE God, Like I am mad crazy in love with him, and yes I am a sinner, and likely need church just as much as I want church. But I cannot get enough of God. I don't want to go to Disney when I can go to church, I don't want to have dinner with a friend, or go to a movie, when I can study God's Word. I surly don;t want to work, or do housework, or anything mundane. I work overnights and there are plenty of nights where it would be easier for me to miss Fuse (which goes till almost 10) and get home and get started on work, but in my head, I just know that will be the week that God's message is just for me, because every time I hear a message I know God is intending for me to hear it. I give a lot of my time to my church, or rather they give me the time, because honestly the couple hours I put in in with the kids, or helping in someway don;t compare to what I get out of it. However there are constantly people telling me I do to much, or I need to take me time. I hope I convey to them, that this is "me time." I am never happier than when helping others, and I am so happy giving my entire self away if I have to, if it means more time at "church."

I'm not saying I have this all figured out, not by a LONG shot, but I do know I'll never figure it out by going to an amusement park.

I realize this turned into an entirely different post than I intended. Its sound more like a vent from me, and maybe it is. This isn't even half of the message from Tuesday night, but its honestly the part that spoke the most to me. I'm getting geared up for week 4, Ive heard it is a literal assault on your person, and a fight with the Word, sometimes the Bible is scary, and its hard to read, and you leave it feeling far worse, or more inadequate, than when you found it. So I'm ready for my assault.

Crazy/Love Week 1

Fuse, the college and career aged group I belong to at church is taking a bit of a detour this summer, and rather than having a service (and seriously amazing worship) we are using the 10 weeks when many people are on summer break to study Crazy/Love by Francis Chan, this is the 2nd and a half time Ive read the book, notice the half because I gave away my cope before I finished it the 2nd time.

This week we covered chapter one, which rather than me synopsizing it for you, ill give you a brief description. Basically I'd call the chapter CHECK YOURSELF.

God is God, he is Holy, and all powerful, just and fair, everywhere and ALWAYS. Just because you are the biggest flame in your fire doesn't mean you hold a candle to GOD. Too many people forget this, they question God, they discount God, they lose trust in God or worst of all of these, they go on with their daily lives believing in God but giving him little thought and definitely not loving him with all their heart.

The stand out sentence for our Pastor that he based his study on this week was...

To just read the Bible, attend church, and avoid “big” sins— is this passionate, wholehearted love for God? —François Fénelon,The Seeking Heart

Honestly is it? To me its not, I'm the first one to tell people I was Baptised at 14 spent 10 years, believing in God, then I finally started living for God. This is so new for me, and I love every second of it. Life isn't about cars or jobs or success, but it also isn't about Christian music, church socials and feeding the homeless, as great as these things are, life is about GOD glorifying God and worshiping GOD.

The thing that struck me the most, as I was reading and even though we didn't cover it in the study was, when people, sometimes believers, myself included say things like : If there is a God where are their starving children in Africa**? When in reality God could ask us the same question. Why with all the undying LOVE God shows us and provides as ARE there starving children?

**This obviously isn't exclusive to Africa, y'all just know Kenya hold a place in my heart.

And while we are on the subject of Africa I leave you with a picture from Kenya in January.



*******Obviously anything said here, is not Doctrine, or even necessarily Biblical, it is MY interpretation, my thoughts*********